How Avatar should have ended [maybe spoilers]

FADE OUT:

EXTREME CLOSE UP — HUMAN EYES
but they appear a bit different, almost white.

INT. CHAMBER
JAKE SULLY opens his very human eyes, crying, eyes squinting to see in the darkness of the chamber.

CUT TO AN EXTERNAL MONITOR
We see the words “Game Over”, with two dialogue options “Back to menu” and “Start New Game +”.

(The horror)

PAN TO HIS EMACIATED RIGHT HAND
as he scrambles for another disc, but he knocks the cases over. We see tubes attached to his hand transporting a strange blue substance

JAKE, cursing, gets up to try and look for a disc. We get a closer look at his face, instead of seeing the well defined features of an ex-marine, we see a fat american, face bloated with warts from years of blatant disregard for his hygiene. As he searches frantically for a disc, we realise he is almost blind from not using his eyes regularly.

CLOSE UP JAKE SULLY’S FACE
as it distorts first into a grotesque expression, almost in pain, but then into a cherubic smile, almost like this..

(rosseebudd)

He inserts the disc into the machine, which gives a soft whirl. CAMERA PANS AGAIN TO THE EXTERNAL MONITOR, but from this angle we can in the distant background the soft outlines of Jake’s fleshy body. The screen now displays the XBOX 1080 logo, followed by a screen which says “Choose your avatar” and displays a variety of hyper-realistic figures.

ALTERNATING SHOTS between JAKE’S FACE as he smiles and the AVATARS smile.

ZOOM OUT ON JAKE SULLY’S BODY NOW IN A FETAL POSITION
(mirroring the shot of him lying in the hammock early on in the movie) as he clutches a disc, smiling happily. We see ALTERNATING SHOTS between different people of different races (have to be all inclusive), all in the same position, and as the camera continues to zoom out, we see they are all lying in pods, thousands of them tethered to a big metallic structure which resembles a tree. CAMERA CONTINUES TO ZOOM OUT as we realise the tree is situated on a barely visible island, now flooded by dirty green water.

THE END

Music playing throughout: “Lux Aeterna” from Requiem for a Dream (About the only time this track would be appropriately used.)

How Avatar should have ended [maybe spoilers]

Granny cougars

This is a classic case of blaming the victim.

We don’t blame girls who wear short skirts when they become the target of rapists, do we (at least, it is unethically do so). They shouldn’t have to stop wearing something that makes them feel sexy just because some men can’t control themselves.

So, join the fight for the right of middle aged women to wear obnoxious and obscene amounts of gaudy 24k gold jewellery. It helps them get the guys.

Granny cougars

starting anew

yes hi i’m back to blogging.

i decided to unsubscribe all my google reader feeds except lifehacker and kotaku and personal blogs. i’m an rss addict. i’ll just stay in my little corner and not lift my eyes from the screen as i go through all the feeds, looking at the unread counter decrease slowly 1 by 1. The next day i’ll wake up and look at it and it has jumped ahead 200 items. 2 weeks later, half the holidays have passed and it feels like i haven’t been enriched or educated or done anything worthwhile. so this has to stop. there’s too much hubris on the internet. its up to you now, dear friends, to entertain me.

starting anew